Freedom

I’ve realized that I’ve mistakenly rejected or avoided those very few who have or had the ability to understand me.  Perhaps it was my fear to feel exposed, or vulnerable to someone who inevitably would have great power over me.  I know it must've been insecurity, but the loss of control (or what I perceived as that) wasn't something I was ready for.  Instead I chose to be around those who only underestimated me.  Disappointment was nothing but a deserved result.  I was so dependent to feeling safe.  I always prided myself in my accomplishments, or my independence, thinking that it only entailed self-sufficiency.  Little did I know that I was nothing but a slave: a slave of my own fears and erroneous ideas.  Now, I am a work in progress, I have a long way to go, but I feel like I'm closer as now I understand what freedom really means.  

I always thought that independence guaranteed freedom; I still do, but my understanding of independence has completely changed.  I associated independence with having money, things or means (or not having to rely on someone else's financial support to survive).  I was wrong; turns out you’re never as free as when you find yourself with nothing.  Not one thing at all to hold you down… to cut your wings.  Not owing anything... but also not owning anything.  Independence is about your insights, your self-reflection, your stimulus to live.  If you don’t know yourself, if you don’t have absolute control of your thoughts, feelings and ideas, things like cars, money, clothes can enslave you and keep you exactly where you are, forever.   Letting go of the materialistic possessions, letting go of trivial concerns –those which society injects into our minds- to seek a higher purpose, a deeper meaning, a better understanding of your own existence… that’s where freedom lies.  Being able to run free, move to a new city, find a way to travel the world, to disappear, to let go of it all, to choose your thoughts, to choose yourself, to control what you feel, to live happy by choice, to know who you are and love yourself for just that; now that’s freedom, and that's what I see now as the independence I'm striving for.

Grey's Anatomy Quotes

"This is the fight.  It's not a dying pain, it's a healing pain.  You won.  We won." - Derek

"If by the time the pain of not doing a thing gets worse than the fear of doing it, it can feel like we're carrying around a giant tumor." - Meredith

"Knowing is better than wondering.  And even the biggest failure, even the most, intractable mistake beats the heck out of never trying." -Mer

Noble

That which you could achieve with the gift of a superior intellect could never be more valuable than that which you could achieve with the gift of a kindness. No talent or wit would uplift a soul as much as the simple act of giving love (and respect) would. Until you possess those traits, you're still a mediocre soul.

Rare

Love in perfect equilibrium isn't to couples as the gift of breathing is to the living.  It is more like the gift of music to a deaf prodigy.  Pure and rare.

Agua de Juvencia

Agua de Juvencia

"... se revela tu alma, cristalina como el 'agua de Juvencia'."


"Juvencia es un lugar en Italia del siglo 12, en tiempo de San Francisco de Asis, famosa por sus aguas.
Hay una historia al respecto:
Se dice que en una ocasión, un fraile de la orden recién fundada por Francisco de Asis, le hizo esta pregunta al Maestro fundador: 'Hermano, yo se que hablas con Dios, yo se que lo has visto. Dime, cómo es Dios?' A lo cual Francisco de Asis respondió después de un gran silencio. 'Dios es como un vaso de agua pura de Juvencia'.
Que El te siga bendiciendo."


JP

Quick Advice on Love

If you want someone to fall in love with you, don't just go out of your way to show him how special you think he is, or act out things you think will attract him. Go out of your way to show him how special you think YOU are. Love yourself.  Let others see that. "You teach others how to treat you."  Be genuine because if you can't back up what you sold upfront down the road, he will be deceived, and you will be replaced.  Have dignity; know when it is time to step away.  Show yourself some respect.  Know that you are amazing and worthy of love, so don't go out of your way to chase love around.  If you deserve it, it will chase you

Eternal (a letter to my sister)

If only I could save you.  If only I could somehow absorb and take away all the pain you've suffered.  If only I could protect you like I always wanted to.  I guess life has its twists and turns; one never ends up where planned.  I just really wish I could at least share, or help you with your burden.  It is so unfair sometimes, to have to drag along the heaviness of someone else's mistakes.  I just don't understand how you endure, how you go through with it.  I don't get where you find your strength.  I don't understand how your heart can still hold so much love.  So much pain and love it seems it's what it's made of.  Wow, I love you so much.  I need you in my life and I need to be in yours.  I wish you'd open up.  I wish you knew how loved you are, how bad I want to help.  I wish I could make you believe this, but my words are so weak... like I never really learned how to talk to you.  I feel so sad, I feel so hurt for you... so mad... so ready to give up.  I want to stay here, to stop running... I want to give up, to just do what I was born to.  I feel everything I've done is nothing, and everything I tried I failed.  But all I have is my love... It still exists... hungrier than ever.  Wanting today to finally show it.  I don't even know how.  I don't even think I have your trust.  I think it was just a moment... a moment for you to let go of some of that pain.  But how real is it?  I mean, How open are your arms?  Do you trust me? Do you even want me around?  I don't know why I've let this crumble.  I should've listened and paid closer attention.  I Hope my words don't sound so weak... I hope you truly know deep down how much I care.  I hope you know I'd do anything for you... because I love you.  The kind of love you don't need to be protected from.  Eternal... please believe it
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