I Drown

I drown in glistening ashes
Vibrant and powerful
The ashes of regret
Drowning in depths of blue water
Would be just too calm
Too peaceful, too unfair
One could swim or float
In depths of wisdom
But I can't
So I drown in heavy mud
The cold, thick, relentless
That grips to my soul so tightly
Pinning me down forever
Dragging me through thorns of truth
Where my tears burn me
I drown in a malignant fire
In spirals of unforgiving fury
Welcoming and inviting
Where my broken spirit succumbs
And my pride is your accomplice
So here, I drown in you
My demon of ferocious influence
You've slit my present and my joy
You repeatedly killed me
But you say dying is easy
Not enough revenge
Not enough forgiveness
If a debt must then be paid
I render all I could have left
Today I drowned in hell
As I drowned in your embrace